The more I think about my marriage, past and present. The more I realize, though I am a loving and dedicated mother, the same could not be said about being a wife. According the the biblical principals of marriage, the spouse is to go before the children. I am a far way from that. If I were to be honest... I don't even know if I treat them equally.
I am not exactly sure what being a good wife entails at this point, but I am positive that I am not now or ever have been a good one. I don't even love Husband unconditionally. I don't love him with a Godly love, the kind that is spoken about in the bible. If I came home everyday to someone I felt didn't love me enough, I would not only become angry and bitter, but I would give up. Love... Unconditional love is the greatest gift we could give one another.
Instead of spending the last nine years afraid of what marriage meant to who I was, I should have been embracing what it meant for us. The original design for marriage was simple.. To intertwine yourselves with one another, to become one unity. Genesis 2:24 "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one." No matter what Husband says or how he acts, I know that it is my job to remember this. To love him the way God intended, the way we are instructed in ! Corinthians 13:4-8 "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trust, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."
The feminist part of me gets in the way of truly understanding what a good wife is to be, according to the Word, and I hope to someday figure out, and apply it my dear Husband, but nothing could block what this verse says tome. That this is the way we are to love one another, especially our spouses. We love our children in this way, not our partners as well? If I could apply this love to my marriage, to Husband then I am sure the rest will fall in place, or be revealed. For now this all I can handle, I am sure, and Abba knows! So I will spend sometime every day exclaiming this verse over myself! "I am patient, I am kind. I do not envy, I do not boast, I am not proud. I am not rude, I am not self-seeking, I am not easily angered, I keep no record of wrongs. I do not delight in evil but I rejoice with the truth. I will always protect, always trust, always hope, always persevere. I will never fail."
I am not exactly sure what being a good wife entails at this point, but I am positive that I am not now or ever have been a good one. I don't even love Husband unconditionally. I don't love him with a Godly love, the kind that is spoken about in the bible. If I came home everyday to someone I felt didn't love me enough, I would not only become angry and bitter, but I would give up. Love... Unconditional love is the greatest gift we could give one another.
Instead of spending the last nine years afraid of what marriage meant to who I was, I should have been embracing what it meant for us. The original design for marriage was simple.. To intertwine yourselves with one another, to become one unity. Genesis 2:24 "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one." No matter what Husband says or how he acts, I know that it is my job to remember this. To love him the way God intended, the way we are instructed in ! Corinthians 13:4-8 "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trust, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."
The feminist part of me gets in the way of truly understanding what a good wife is to be, according to the Word, and I hope to someday figure out, and apply it my dear Husband, but nothing could block what this verse says tome. That this is the way we are to love one another, especially our spouses. We love our children in this way, not our partners as well? If I could apply this love to my marriage, to Husband then I am sure the rest will fall in place, or be revealed. For now this all I can handle, I am sure, and Abba knows! So I will spend sometime every day exclaiming this verse over myself! "I am patient, I am kind. I do not envy, I do not boast, I am not proud. I am not rude, I am not self-seeking, I am not easily angered, I keep no record of wrongs. I do not delight in evil but I rejoice with the truth. I will always protect, always trust, always hope, always persevere. I will never fail."
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