A few weeks ago, I was at a conference in Erie, PA. The word for the weekend was self righteousness. At first I heard the word and it went in one ear and out the other, but as the weekend continued the Holy Spirit revealed, how self- righteous I have been in my walk with Christ.
When I was first saved I had a strong desire to be closer to God. I did what the bible said, and what people suggested. I flooded my life in God's word, and studied and prayed and learned, and longed for more. I got closer to the Lord, and continued to do all the "right" things. Then the closeness just stopped. So much happened in my life, and the stress of the enemies moves, weighed heavily on my life. I hadn't felt the power of the Holy Spirit in months, and the closeness I once felt with Jesus Christ was gone. I still loved him and wanted more, but my actions and words, and studying, didn't seem to be enough! For awhile I blamed it on stress, but that weekend the Holy Spirit revealed that though I was doing the right things, I was doing it with the wrong heart.
I prayed for people and laid hands on them, because in some sense it made ME feel special. I took it hard and personal if someone didn't feel something when I prayed. (Don't get me wrong, I wanted them healed or to feel better, but I wanted to feel special too) I realized that almost everything I do, is for the sake of feeling some sort of individuality. Even my style of parenting. I longed for compliments on what I was doing,and waited for someone to say, "Liz you are so close to God, or I have a prophetic word for you," or anything that would make me feel special in God's eyes. What I realized was that, I wasn't really doing anything for God's glory, but for MY glory.
I realized that Jesus Christ was my best friend, but what kind of friend had I been to Jesus? I am sorry to say, not a very good one. It has been a one sided relationship for the past 28 years, and I want more! I want Jesus to be able to say, "That Liz Toner has been a great friend to me." And not in a way that makes me feel special. I want to make Jesus feel special. Isn't that what we should be doing?
How do we be Jesus' friend? We worship Him, we praise Him, we lift Him up, and appreciate all He has done for us. I want to help Him find His lost children, to tell the world how wonderful of a friend he has been for me. I want to listen to His problems. His problems are the problems of others on this earth. His tears are the tears fallen from the people we are too busy to be concerned with. We can be His friend simply by showing others, His lost children, the love He has shown us!
I don't know about you, but I want to be Jesus' BFF...FOREVER
When I was first saved I had a strong desire to be closer to God. I did what the bible said, and what people suggested. I flooded my life in God's word, and studied and prayed and learned, and longed for more. I got closer to the Lord, and continued to do all the "right" things. Then the closeness just stopped. So much happened in my life, and the stress of the enemies moves, weighed heavily on my life. I hadn't felt the power of the Holy Spirit in months, and the closeness I once felt with Jesus Christ was gone. I still loved him and wanted more, but my actions and words, and studying, didn't seem to be enough! For awhile I blamed it on stress, but that weekend the Holy Spirit revealed that though I was doing the right things, I was doing it with the wrong heart.
I prayed for people and laid hands on them, because in some sense it made ME feel special. I took it hard and personal if someone didn't feel something when I prayed. (Don't get me wrong, I wanted them healed or to feel better, but I wanted to feel special too) I realized that almost everything I do, is for the sake of feeling some sort of individuality. Even my style of parenting. I longed for compliments on what I was doing,and waited for someone to say, "Liz you are so close to God, or I have a prophetic word for you," or anything that would make me feel special in God's eyes. What I realized was that, I wasn't really doing anything for God's glory, but for MY glory.
I realized that Jesus Christ was my best friend, but what kind of friend had I been to Jesus? I am sorry to say, not a very good one. It has been a one sided relationship for the past 28 years, and I want more! I want Jesus to be able to say, "That Liz Toner has been a great friend to me." And not in a way that makes me feel special. I want to make Jesus feel special. Isn't that what we should be doing?
How do we be Jesus' friend? We worship Him, we praise Him, we lift Him up, and appreciate all He has done for us. I want to help Him find His lost children, to tell the world how wonderful of a friend he has been for me. I want to listen to His problems. His problems are the problems of others on this earth. His tears are the tears fallen from the people we are too busy to be concerned with. We can be His friend simply by showing others, His lost children, the love He has shown us!
I don't know about you, but I want to be Jesus' BFF...FOREVER
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